We Are Zombies (2023)

In a world where humans peacefully coexist with docile zombies, who are treated as second-class citizens due to their "living-impaired" handicap, small-time thief Maggie Neard intercepts a call to collect an unwanted zombie via the Coleman Corporation's Retirement Services for the Living-Impaired. Posing as the collectors, Maggie's half-brother Karl and his best friend Freddy Mercks pick up the zombie from the McKenna residence, although they accidentally decapitate the zombie and it bites a family member. Due to the damage, the crew's black market contact Don only pays the trio half-price for the zombie. Meanwhile Hannity, a militaristic officer for the Coleman Corporation, berates his collectors Stanley and Rocco for repeatedly allowing the three thieves to intercept zombies they were assigned to pick up. Hannity orders the two of them to recover the $25,000 total they've missed out on.

Freddy reveals to Karl that his longtime crush on Maggie has inspired him to propose to her with a garish ring. When Karl counters that Freddy and Maggie have never even dated, Freddy insults Karl for being a chronic masturbator. Stanley and Rocco capture the two distracted friends during their argument. While confronting Karl and Freddy, Rocco accidentally shoots himself and becomes a zombie. Karl mentions his grandmother Mrs. Neard, which gives Stanley a new idea to get back the money he's owed.

Upon recovering at home with Maggie after having been knocked unconscious, Karl and Freddy find a videotape where Stanley and Rocco reveal they kidnapped Mrs. Neard and are demanding a ransom. Desperate to make quick cash, Karl, Maggie, and Freddy turn to Don for a job. Don refers the three thieves to controversial performance artist Otto Maddox, who negotiates to pay the trio $50,000 if they steal the corpse of actress Debbie Jones, who was famously first to play Zelvirella, a character similar to Vampira. Concerned that the undead will eventually outnumber the living, Hannity presents his "Project Zoltan," an experimental gas designed to reengineer zombies, to Coleman Corporation's board of directors. During a demonstration performed by Dr. Judith West, the undead test subject's head unexpectedly explodes. Disappointed with these results, Coleman CEO Bob Coleman terminates the project. However, Coleman subsequently dies from a sex swing "accident" (presumably killed by Hannity) and resurrects as a brain-damaged zombie, so Hannity uses the opportunity to take control of the company. Hannity later tests Project Zoltan on Coleman as well as Dr. West to confirm he can turn zombies feral.

Karl, Maggie, and Freddy infiltrate Country Hill Cemetery only to discover Debbie Jones's corpse is too skeletal to be reanimated. Maggie recognizes Stanley as her ex-boyfriend when he calls to reinforce his ransom demand. During that same call, Rocco carelessly shoots Mrs. Neard, who then becomes a zombie. Karl remembers that Jane, an undead, online sex performer he has a fascination with, resembles Zelvirella and can stand in for Debbie Jones. Along with Freddy and Maggie, Karl goes to the place where Jane performs and convinces her to come with them. Following a series of mishaps and odd events, including Karl having sex with Jane and an encounter with a state trooper, Karl, Freddy, and Maggie escort Jane back to Otto Maddox's private suite above his latest performance art show. Meanwhile, Hannity deploys his Project Zoltan gas on the show floor, which makes the zombies suddenly turn violent against humans.

Not wanting to see Jane leave because he has romantic feelings for her, Karl calls off the deal with Otto. Jane still chooses to go with Otto, so Karl confesses she isn't the real Zelvirella. Otto grows angry, but his outrage is interrupted when an undead Mother Theresa comes up to the suite and kills him. Don escapes with a briefcase full of Otto's money while everyone else in the room fights off another zombie. Don ends up overwhelmed by zombies when he gets down to the show floor. Jane collects the dropped briefcase and tries sneaking away as Karl, Maggie, and Freddy learn they have been framed as bioterrorists for the attack on Otto's art show.

Hannity captures Jane. Stanley reveals he was disguised as one of Hannity's henchmen when he unmasks and takes Hannity at gunpoint. Freddy breaks Hannity's neck, but he resurrects as a zombie and shoots Freddy. Maggie kills Hannity by decapitating him with a buzzsaw. Freddy reveals he survived the gunshot because the bullet hit the ring he planned to give to Maggie. Stanley steals the briefcase in the commotion. Stanley escapes, but he gets bit in the process and becomes a zombie.

Two weeks later, Karl, Maggie, Freddy, and Jane avoid getting arrested for the supposed terrorist attack, but only because Hannity's viral gas turned the world into a typical zombie apocalypse. Along with Rocco and Mrs. Neard, the four of them continue surviving in a diner owned by Freddy's Uncle Dave while Stanley wanders the wasteland still clutching the briefcase.